


Once in a while

by kimposibl



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Reminiscing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-03
Updated: 2017-06-03
Packaged: 2018-11-08 13:45:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11082816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimposibl/pseuds/kimposibl
Summary: Eren considers himself lucky that Mikasa will lend him her strength. He hopes he gives her strength, too.





	Once in a while

**Author's Note:**

> Eren and Mikasa friendship doesn't get enough love. Mikasa is one of the best female characters in anime, in my opinion. She's also my fave.

 

Whenever Mikasa comes to his rescue, Eren always wonders where the shy, albeit sad, girl from their youth went. The first time she interfered in one of Eren’s fights, he marveled at her strength, the finesse with which she brought the other kids to their knees. After the third time, Eren decided he needed her to stop fighting his battles for him because he was a boy, and he didn’t need to be protected by a girl. It should be the other way around. The first time and only time he rescued her had started to become a distant memory.

 

Eren sometimes thinks back to the time Mikasa first came home with them. Carla, distraught over hearing what had happened, fussed over them both endlessly. They’d managed to go back to the Ackermans to collect some of Mikasa’s belongings, mainly clothes and a couple of keepsake items of her parents, but Mikasa otherwise seemed fine with letting anything of her old family go. The Jaegers didn’t have a huge house, but they had an attic that was to be converted to Eren’s new room. For the moment, he would sleep on a futon on the floor, and Mikasa would have his bed. After Mikasa took her first bath there, she dressed in pajamas and wrapped the scarf Eren gave her around her neck.

 

“Are you still cold?” Eren asked her, digging in his wardrobe for his sleep clothes.

 

“No,” Mikasa said. Eren looked at her unassuming, slumped form on the bed and didn’t ask why she still needed the scarf when it was warm enough inside their house. When he came back from his bath, Mikasa was already under the covers, turned to the wall, and the oil lamp was still burning on the desk. He snuffed it and made himself comfortable on the futon.

 

“Goodnight, Mikasa,” he said.

 

“Goodnight, Eren.”

 

Sometime in the night, Eren felt a warm weight settle at his side. He moved over without saying anything and promptly fell back asleep.

 

She slid into Eren’s futon in the middle of the night three consecutive times more until Eren decided they should just share the bed. He knew he shouldn’t have enabled her, but her parents were killed in front of her, and he didn’t want her to feel alone or scared. His parents probably knew about it though never brought it up. After a month or so, long after the attic was ready, Mikasa stopped clinging to Eren so tightly.

 

He’ll never admit it, but he kind of misses having her depend on him like that. Soon after, it seemed like she only wanted to help him, or be useful to him in some way. For a while, he thought she was trying to pay him back, as if she owed him her life. But when he confronted her about it, she said she just wanted to be by his side. With her eyes lowered, face half buried in her red scarf, Eren reassured her that they’ll stay together, no matter what.

 

“But let me do things on my own, too,” he insisted. Mikasa only nodded. Eren should have known what a lie that would be.

 

The jeering from the bullies only got to Eren because he had his own insecurities about Mikasa. Not that he wanted to show off or anything, but it was a little embarrassing when a pretty, lithe girl could kick ass better than a boy her age. It was probably more embarrassing for the bullies getting thrashed by her, but at least they put up a fight. Eren was impulsive, competitive, and short tempered (still is) so sometimes he picked fights just so he could prove he didn’t need Mikasa defending him, but in the end, Mikasa always showed up and single handedly destroyed Eren’s opponents while lecturing him about going home and doing chores for his mother.

 

“Mikasa is really strong,” Armin said once, in awe from the sidelines, heavy book in his hands. Eren, nursing a bloody nose and swelling eye, tried not to sulk too hard.

 

“It was four against one, so I tired them out before Mikasa got here,” Eren said around the copper taste in his mouth. Armin looked like he wanted to laugh but didn’t comment. Eren wasn’t offended because that was a weak, bullshit lie even to his ears.

 

He used to think that Mikasa was stifling him. He couldn’t improve if she was always helping him. But she just made him want to do better – be better – for himself, for Armin, and for her.

 

“Show Mikasa you can protect her,” Carla once said in exasperation, cleaning Eren’s wounds none too gently.

 

Only the strongest, most daring man could protect Mikasa. Eren wonders if Carla knew that, if she believed Eren would – _could_ – be that person.

 

He watches as Mikasa finishes practicing using the 3D Maneuver Gear off of horseback in an open field, her movements agile and efficient as she soars through the air and sticks the landing. She looks around to find Eren and makes her way towards him, the awed gazes of their peers and superiors trailing after her. Her eyes are only fixed on him.

 

“Did you do okay?” Mikasa asks when she’s a couple of feet away, looking him over. Eren tries not to feel embarrassed about the scuffs of dirt all over his uniform and hair from falling on the ground so much during his training session. Mikasa, on the other hand, only has dirt on the soles of her boots. “Do you want me to help you next time?”

 

“I did fine,” Eren grumbles, glancing off to the side. She doesn’t mention the obvious burning in his ears.

 

They walk back towards camp with their horses in tow. The sun is finally setting behind them, casting the earth in a hazy, golden glow. He glances at Mikasa, at her pale skin, dark hair, and red scarf, and wonders not for the first time what she was like before that night, if she smiled more or was less snarky and sarcastic than she is now. If tragedy and survival hadn’t brought them together, would they still have been like this? He sometimes wishes he met her sooner, just to know that part of her. But most of the time, he’s happy she’s here with him like this.

 

He wants to explore the world with her and Armin. Going to a beach with his two best friends is the only thing that keeps him motivated these days.

 

“Actually, I could probably use some pointers,” he admits. Mikasa looks at him and gives him a small smile, her eyes softening. The fading light of then sun makes the iron ore color of her irises look like polished steel.

 

“Anything you need.”

 

Eren considers himself lucky that Mikasa will lend him her strength. He hopes he gives her strength, too.

 

 

 


End file.
